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发表于 2008-9-7 11:11
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【转载】关于成为一个 群体领袖（Alpha Male） 的建议【中英对照】
本帖最后由 majestytony 于 2009-1-3 01:22 编辑
Becoming a true Alpha male;关于成为一个 群体领袖（Alpha Male） 的建议
Becoming a true Alpha male
I still see some questions on what’s alpha and what not act is so I’ll make this its own thread. Credit goes to the owner of the Hawaii PUA. THE 55 LAWS OF THE ALPHA MALE:
1. Always take up a lot of space. Beta-males always shrink up as if they were apologizing for their own personal waste of space. Be territorial. Claim it because you own it.
2. Be calmer than everyone around you. Stress (talking about it or showing it) is an indicator of Beta-male status. Be unaffected by what others are affected by. Heat, sweat, cold, stress, etc¦ Leaders are aloof and confident.
3. Slow down body movements. Visualize moving in a pool. Relax your eyelids.
4. Resist the fear that you will piss people off. Be willing to be distracted when someone is talking to you. Be willing to take the lead and end the conversation when you want to. You should be the initiator for most conversations too.
5. STOP trying to please everyone and make him or her like you. Start qualifying everyone and don't give any fake smiles, laughs or gestures until they EARN IT!
6. Develop a sense of impudence: Take liberties you know you deserve.
7. Know your own worth. When someone does you a favor or gives you something, don't over appreciate. Know that you deserved it and you had it coming from them. Act as though it is expected when people help, do favors and give things to you. Set boundaries and limitations
on what you will tolerate from others.
8. Confidence: This is simply freedom from self-doubt, and having strong beliefs in your own actions, words and abilities. Don't over-analyze this.
9. Be supportive of `lesser' males. Aggression is never a good idea. Use praise instead. Make sure your friends are safe and they see you ensuring their safety.
10. Smile less often. It doesn't make you rude, just discerning. People should earn your smiles and laughs. Give them as rewards when people win you over.
11. Don't EVER act apologetic. Don't use excuses or feel the need to explain your actions, EVER!
12. Time with you is valuable and rare; you are busy and focused on yourself.
13. Frame equals mood + beliefs about the current situation. Don't get sucked into anyone's mood. Pull them into yours, forcefully. Be the pillar of strength that is unmovable. Why do you think strippers like those poles so much?
14. If you don't define the meaning of the interaction, the other person will do it for you.
15. Remain silent every once in a while after someone finishes talking. Look at them and wait¦ they will keep talking to make you happy.
16. Speak slowly. You will NOT loose the group's attention.
17. Every once in a while, choose a time for you when you will be closed off for the day. Just stand in quiet confidence and be as silent as possible. People will try to get you to talk and wonder what's up.
18. Don't ever laugh at your own jokes. This kills!
19. Make statements whenever possible. People should have to earn your questions.
20. Don't look around at other people trying to get energy or attention from them. Your energy is within you. Be in your own universe, you can have a welcome mat, but others should still be a guest.
21. Hold everyone's attention. If they look away or get distracted, be the first to walk away, get even more distracted or become immediately busy.
22. ELIMINATE the fear of being the one to break a group's state by taking the lead and beginning or ending something first so that others will follow.
23. Make yourself COMFORTABLE. Don't be uncomfortable when speaking to others or groups. Face the direction you feel like facing.
24. Make strong eye contact. You don't have to have a serious face on when you do this. That's stupid. Smirk a tiny bit like you know more than they do.
25. Don't try to make people like you, make then think you are from the future- Mystery
26. At the first sign of people's indecision, be the FIRST to speak up and take action.
27. Don't wait to take control. Seize the opportunity.
28. Out alpha the AMOGS by shoulder taps, friendly elbows, compliments and putting social pressure on him. Social pressure is only using a psychological spotlight.
29. When a competing male tries to challenge you or take control of the group, ignore him, don't make eye contact, and keep your body posture. (Shoulders back and relaxed, head back, smile a little.) Comment when he's finished.
30. Be comfortable having complete control of the group. It is a responsibility you must take on. Don't be afraid that you will screw things up.
31. with men: Start qualifying immediately. As soon as you get them to qualify, compliment them on something and start telling a story before they can respond.
32. Being in control is simple: It only about believes fully in what you are doing. Believe that you have the best plan of action and no one could possibly do better.
33. If someone says something you don't like, SMILE, roll your eyes a little and give them a look as if they were a cute little kid.
34. You must be the one who expends the least amount of nervous energy. You will then be in control. Let others get nervous; wondering if they are impressing you or not.
35. be talkative: Say whatever is on your mind and don't worry about the consequences. Just be a talkative person.
36. Don't be afraid to make others feel bad. If you feel you need to say something, say it. Don't ever try to camouflage your intent. Be honest and direct. This will earn you all kinds of respect points.
37. Resist the need to share the intensity of emotions you're feeling.
38. Touch people when you talk to them. Know that it's okay to do.
39. Don't pause too long when someone asks you a question. This indicates your deep thinking about the question and your need to give them the best possible answer. Stop dong this!
40. Steeple your hands when you speak if you feel like you are getting a little nervous. This shows LOTS of confidence and is a leader indicator.
41. Don't walk too fast. This is another behavior that is used to break your own frame. Slow down and relax. Know you are the MAN.
42. Straighten your spine, tilt your pelvis forward, relax and spread out. Take up space, it's YOURS!!
43. Don't always respond when someone calls your name. When you do respond, turn your head to them slowly.
44. Keep it short and to the point. Don't go into some elaborate and boring story. (I know you love it, but it's boring)
45. When you ask advice from other people, let them have the spotlight. Don't be afraid to let someone else stand in the spotlight for a while. Compliment them when they do.
46. Never stop someone from performing acts of generosity towards you, or be too thankful when they do.
47. Be dominant and in control. If you don't like the conversation, walk away. Start talking to someone else in the middle of the conversation if you feel like it. You are the alpha and you are in charge. Regardless of income, rank etc. you are the leader.
48. Don't ever brag about yourself. Not bragging builds mystery. Let them discover things on their own.
49. Don't EVER put yourself down! Alpha males do not do this unless it is an OBVIOUS joke! It's okay to make a joke to convey the opposite of what you are saying in the joke.
50. Don't ever put others down or talk badly about someone else!!! This is key. When you put others down, it reveals your own insecurities. If they are no threat, don't act like they are. Women will take up sides with anyone you decide to put down.
51. Live a life of DISCIPLINE AND FUN: The two secret ingredients in the alpha male's life.
52. If you treat people like they are cooler than you are, you are a beta-male.
53. If you `put up' with disrespectful behavior, you are a beta-male.
54. Use clean language unless you really have to curse. Profanity is just like verbal violence: The people who use it are usually totally insecure and frightened by their lack of dominance.
55. Use violence as a LAST resort. The pack leader of any pack is not a bully
本文翻译
关于成为一个 群体领袖（Alpha Male） 的建议
最近经常有人问我，什么样的处事方式和举止行为能让自己表现地更像一个群体领袖，为方便大家，我特意总结了以下的55条。
1. 不吝啬空间。AM通常一个人独占较大的空间，潜意识里表达出自己是最有地位的人，不怕侵犯到其他人。
2. 比身边的任何人表现地都要冷静。情绪不会被其他人和事所影响，领导者通常都有十足的自信和一点冷漠。
3. 放慢自己的动作。通常只有未成年人才会给人风风火火的感觉。
4. 不要担心自己会得罪他人。AM往往都坚守自己的原则，做到对事不对人。
5.不做那些讨好人的事。会不时地删选他人，从来没有虚假的笑容和动作。
6.性格里有一点玩世不恭的态度。
7.知道自己的价值。当别人帮助你时，给了你一些好处时，不要表现地太感激。因为你值得别人为你这么做。你可以在事后的交往中还他们人情。但是不要表现地太过于感激。
8.自信。不要怀疑自己的能力，但是也不要盲目自信：）
9.乐于帮助其他男性，与人对立永远不是个好主意。称赞他们，帮助他们并让他们看到你为他们做的事。
10.少笑些，这不会让人觉得你粗鲁。别人应该通过努力才能得到你的好感。
11.永远都不要很明显地去道歉。你没有必要为自己的行为向任何人解释。
12.明白时间的重要性。你很忙，有很多重要的事情等着你去解决。
13.情绪不会被任何人干扰。你应当控制自己的情绪为你的方向服务，而不是没必要地为他人情绪化。
15.当别人讲话结束时，保持一小会的沉默。眼睛看着他们，他们会为了迎合你而继续讲：）
16.放慢速度讲话。你不会因此失去他人对你的注意力。
17.有时会突然沉浸在自己的世界中。不顾周围的环境。偶尔的这样会让你很有魅力。
18. 讲了笑话自己别笑，很傻。
20.别试图通过环顾四周寻求安全感，记住你的力量永远来自你的内心。
你永远是你的世界中的主人，其他人都只是过客。
21.吸引到每个人的关注。如果有人在跟你互动的过程中分神，走开，那就结束互动，马上表现出你很忙的状态。
22.永远不怕成为全体的领袖。不要推开让你成为领袖的任何机会。
23. 永远确保自己是舒适的。在做合适事情时都先保证自己处于一个舒适的状态。
24. 面带微笑，但是眼神必须充满自信。
25.永远都不去讨好别人。吸引是王道。
26.当你们碰到令人犹豫的局面时，成为第一个站出来讲形式，第一个采取行动的人。
27.机会来临的时候，立刻抓住他。而不是等到各方面都完全准备好。
29.当你的群体里出现一个男性，试图挑战你的地位时，无视他，别和他做眼神交流，继续保持你的肢体语言。（肩部放松，身体略微后仰，面带微笑）。在他表现完之后对他进行评价。
31. 碰到其他男性，立刻开始删选他们。当他们回答结束时做一些简短的评论。
32.保持冷静很简单。你相信自己拥有现场做好的行动计划，这个计划能让你比其他人更好地解决事情。
33.如果有人在言语中冒犯了你，微笑，然后像看一个犯错的孩子一般看着他。
34.你必须把自己紧张的情绪降到最低，你就能表现出自己自信的一面了。让别人紧张，并担心自己能不能赢得你的好感好了。
35.健谈。随便什么都能说，当然，说的时候最好有自己独特的方式。
36.说话做事不用去担心是否会得罪他人。如果觉得你该说些什么，就直接说。不要去压抑自己表达自己观点。真诚而有直率的言谈能让你赢得一些尊重。
37.永远不要把自己的紧张情绪传染给他人。
38.跟人聊天时，触碰对方。
39.别人问你问题时，不要用太长时间去思考。因为这会暗示你很重视他人，会让你表现地像一个比对方价值低的人。
40. 当你觉得有点紧张时，像金字塔一般交叉双手的手指。很多王者都会有这个肢体语言。
41.说话语速放慢。这会影响你的讲话框架感。尽量放松，随意点。认识到你时一个男人。
42.树起你的脊椎，放松并霸占空间。
43.当别人叫你时，不要过快地反应对方。反应时，慢慢地转过去。只有那些内心渴望得到别人注意的人才会迫不及待地转过头去。
44.讲话简洁，准确。别讲一些无聊的事情。（我知道你喜欢这些故事，但是它们很无趣。）
45.当你向他人请教些问题的时候，把表现的机会让给他们。别担心群体核心地位被其他人暂时占据了。他们结束对你的回答时，做一些评论。
46.永远不要接受别人对你的过分的同情和帮助。
47.占据主导权。如果你不喜欢这个聊天，马上走开。去跟其他人聊一些你喜欢的话题。你是全体中的领袖，你应该主导全体，尽管你的社会地位，收入不如他们中的有些人。
48.别自己讲自己的光荣事迹，别自我吹捧。让别人去自己去发现好了。
49.别说，做一些自降身份的事情。全体领袖不这么做，除非那时一个显而易见的玩笑。
50.永远要尊重他人，不要用语言侮辱对方。侮辱对方，表明那个人对你有危险。这不是领袖做的事。
51.生活自律并充满情趣。这就是一个群体领袖的典型生活状态。
52.如果你跟别人相处时，表现得好像对方是比你更有型的人。那你只是一个Beta-Male。
53.如果你能忍受别人不尊重你的行为。你也不是一个全体领袖。
54.不用粗鲁的语言。
55.不到万不得已不使用暴力。领袖永远不会是一个古惑仔。
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